Sleeping beauty- What prince wants to marry a one hundred sixteen year old girl??? I don't care how pretty she is!
If you know that you are cursed, then STAY AWAY FROM SPINNING WHEELS!!!
Snow white- If you're walking through the forest and see a corpse in a glass coffin with twelve midgets standing around, the most logical thing to do is make out with it right?
Cinderella- You think only one girl in the entire kingdom has that size foot?
If that shoe fit so well, why did it fall off?
That princess's whole life is her feet. Dude, Mr. Prince, my face is UP HERE!
The Wizard of Oz- If you find yourself walking traveling with a lion, a scarecrow, and a robot, you should check out the local asylum, not keep going!
Because all witches are made of brown sugar.
This is a children's story. Why are they getting conked out in a field of drugs???
Little red riding hood- I hope she's blind, because the alternative...
The grandma was in a closet with her nightgown on the wolf. So why does a man come rescue her?
Goldilocks- What an original name.
Do all little girls go wandering through forests?
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Home is behind, the world ahead, and there are many paths to tread.
Through shadows to the edge of night, until the stars are all alight.