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tsunamininja5

Branch: Tomas

I had a very negative experience with middle school - every year was terrible. It really was. In sixth grade I was diagnosed with anxiety and I felt useless and like my life had no purpose, until I started taekwondo at the end of the school year. Then everything got better . . . until I discovered how awful anxiety really was. That was my seventh grade year. In eighth grade I had a truly evil English teacher - he was absolutely HORRIBLE. He never taught us ANYTHING - he only yelled at us and made our lives miserable. I felt unsafe and I was scared to go to English class; the only way to keep myself from running away crying was to think about my taekwondo school the entire class and sit there, not saying a word, not making a sound, looking straight forward. If you looked to the side for one second, you got detention. If you said one word, you got detention. If you and your friend looked at each other across the room, that was considered "communicating" and an email was sent home. And you got detention. He made me cry once, but mostly he didn't directly hurt me. He hurt everyone else in my class, except for one other girl and sometimes another girl too, and sometimes two boys. Everyone else was "disrespectful", when they never even did anything. I wasn't "disrespectful" because I did my homework and got good grades. I got a perfect score on my state writing exam. But the credit for that goes to my elementary school teachers and my sixth grade English teacher (who HAS to be the best school teacher in the world). In eighth grade I learned nothing about writing. Only about fear. Only about what it was like to truly fear a teacher. He only yelled at me once, but I listened when he yelled at my classmates. We weren't best friends, the nineteen of us, but I hated to see them be bullied by him. If I didn't fear him so much, I would have stood up for them. The only reason I didn't was because I was afraid. I was afraid of him, and I was afraid of my parents - one phone call from school, they said, and I can't go to taekwondo for a month. And I knew my English teacher would twist the story, just as "authority figures" at school always do, to make the child look like the villain when the villain is, in reality, the teacher.

 

My English teacher yelled at my classmates for saying "Yeah" instead of saying "Yes", which is pretty pointless in my opinion. He kept demanding respect, but I don't think he respected us that much. I hated the feeling I got being in that class, this negative, awful, sick feeling. I was sad and negative the entire year, the only times I was happy being the times I was at taekwondo, when I was with my friends . . . and a teacher who respected us, a teacher who deserved all the respect he got in return, a teacher who truly cared about his students, a teacher I could trust.

 

That's right, you should be able to trust your teachers. But I didn't trust my English teacher one bit.

 

So you can imagine how terrified I am. I don't want any more teachers like my English teacher. And I want to make more friends - good friends, martial arts friends, not like the rude, hurtful friends I had in middle school - but I'm afraid. I don't want more "friends" who try to change me, "friends" who don't respect me and don't even care about me.

 

So . . . can anyone help me?

 

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- Lahash -

Also known as Samurai

Est. January 2014

 

Author of the Path of Legends series - coming 2020!

 

"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

Branch: Tomas

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- Lahash -

Also known as Samurai

Est. January 2014

 

Author of the Path of Legends series - coming 2020!

 

"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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amazingtiger219

Branch: Ekaterina

Well, you can't do anything but avoid people like your English teacher. If you want nice friends, then look at your peers, and if you see someone who seems nice, then talk to them. If you were right about them, then pursue your friendship with them. 

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Queen Ivy

Thorn Clover Lily Keith Riptide Luke Ryder 

 

Always be yourself, not the person that you pretend to be- NF

 

All the best people are mad- Lewis Carroll 

 

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snakedancing13

Branch: Janus

I'll begin my intro with the fact that I'm homeschooled, which basically means I don't have real human teachers. But for my elementary and sixth grade years, I went to a small private school, and I happen to share your experience with rude and tyrannical teachers.

When I was in second grade, I had the most terrifying woman for my teacher. Now I know second grade is not eighth grade, but tyranny is the same no matter what age group they throw you into. My teacher was much like yours, snapping and mean and bullying us wee little ones. I once spent half of the day crying in the bathroom because the experience was so traumatic and I'm pretty sure I suppressed a lot of my second grade memories.

She was probably the worst teacher I ever had, but now I'm in high school. Now I'm almost an adult. Now I can look back in that partially suppressed second grade year and realize something about my situation. Or, more accurately, my teachers situation. Now that I've lived almost sixteen years, I am aware of the fact how much life hurts. And speaking as someone who's still technically a kid and has anxiety problems too, just think about how hard it would be for an adult. My teacher was probably super stressed. She had three daughters. She was married. And she was a second grade teacher. I don't know what her family life was or how might she was hurting inside, but she was defiantly hurting. And sometimes, when people are hurting, they tend to have those feelings leak out an hurt others. It's like filling a balloon with water: there's only so much stress they can take before they explode.

Now, after that little "I know how you feel" intro, I'll come to the point of why I told you about this. 

Your English teacher was hurting. Just like you're hurting. Even you're good teachers are hurting and under constant stress. Everyone is. Some people don't handle it as well as others, and some people look like the most collected and together people on the planet. But deep down, they're still asking themselves that question; who am I? What am I here for? What's the purpose?

my suggestion is to look at everyone and try to see how they might be struggling. If you have it in your mind that everyone is having a bad time of it, some of their reactions will seem a little more resonance and deserving of compassion. Look at people through the view of "what are they going through?" and "how can I help them?" This will greatly affect the way you treat others and the way you feel about being treated badly.

You shouldn't settle for bullying and teacher from a platform of fear is never acceptable, but when you realize what this person that's hurting you might be going through, you'll realize why they're hurting you.

A lot of times teachers are being undermined by their students. I have a cousin who's a math teacher who nearly lost his job because he confiscated someone's phone because they were playing a game during the lesson. My friends neighbor did lose his job because a student falsely accused him. Teachers have a rough go of it, the least you can do is show them respect, even if they don't deserve it.

 

Now I will apologize for any grammar and spelling mistakes. My excuse: in typing this in my phones and I have sausages for fingers. (And spell check hates me) Don't judge.

 

And if my answer doesn't seem to be actually addressing the problem, I'll throw in another apology for my lack of logic.

 

                  ~Krista~

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Recipient of Mickey's Respect

 

 

        Krista the Key

 

 

    Will you give all you can give

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tsunamininja5

Branch: Tomas

Ivy-

Thank you for the advice. :)

 

Krista-

No, actually, your post was very helpful. I should think about why they're being so mean, just as with any bully, and try to help them. Just as far as respect, I except respect in return.  Respect needs to go both ways. Throughout middle school, I did not feel respected by most of my teachers.

 

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- Lahash -

Also known as Samurai

Est. January 2014

 

Author of the Path of Legends series - coming 2020!

 

"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

Branch: Tomas

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- Lahash -

Also known as Samurai

Est. January 2014

 

Author of the Path of Legends series - coming 2020!

 

"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

Branch: Tomas

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- Lahash -

Also known as Samurai

Est. January 2014

 

Author of the Path of Legends series - coming 2020!

 

"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

Branch: Tomas

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- Lahash -

Also known as Samurai

Est. January 2014

 

Author of the Path of Legends series - coming 2020!

 

"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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ambersnow38

Branch: Janus

 

Well in high school, you have all kinds of teachers. Some are are nice, others not so much. Then you've got those who seem nice but they really don't care. And then you've got those who are really dedicated to their job and care about the students. I guess what I'm trying to say is there's no telling what type of teacher's you'll have. And, unfortuneately, you might have a teacher like your English teacher. And, if you do, my advice would be to tell an adult who is willing to listen and willing to help you.

 

And if no one is willing to help, don't be afraid of standing up for yourself or others. Because there's a chance that things will get worse as the year goes on. Aaand yeah, you may get into trouble. Which always sucks. But you'll accomplish two things. First you'll show that you aren't afraid of their "threats". And second, you may open the door for the problem to be solved.

 

Friend wise..... Uh ....... Well, I'm kind of a habitual introvert. But the best thing you can do is be yourself. I know, that's really cliche but it's really the best thing you can do. That and talking to other people (Like Ivy said). And don't be afraid of making 'bad friends'. Everybody does it at some point(s) in life. And it kind of prevents you from making friends in the first place.

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Reese

 

Be daring, be different, be impractical, be anything that will assert integrity of purpose and imaginative vision against the play-it-safers, the creatures of the commonplace.

 

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tsunamininja5

Branch: Tomas

Thanks, Reese!

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- Lahash -

Also known as Samurai

Est. January 2014

 

Author of the Path of Legends series - coming 2020!

 

"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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spyunicorn1

aka FieryLucian3

Branch: Lucian

*stretches shoulders* *cracks fingers* As a survivor of freshman year, I would like to offer you my advice on this and it might not be good in which case just ignore it xD

 

So, one thing I learned from my eighth grade English teacher, who, in comparison to your teacher, was great, was to challenge authority. She showed us a video at the end of the year about 1) seeing something wrong, 2) recognizing it's wrong, and 3) doing something about it.

 

(unimportant: Also in eighth grade, I was introduced to Les Miserables by my French teacher, and Megan showed me a fanfiction for it called World Ain't Ready. I absolutely loved said story, and it changed me into someone who saw an example of students challenging authority.)

 

Anyways, I learned by the end of ninth grade that there's always someone who can listen to you. If it's not your teacher, talk to a guidance counselor. If not a guidance counselor, talk to the principal. If the principal won't listen, go to the school board. If you're too scared to talk, email them.

 

One thing that I've learned from my freshman year is that if you need something, you HAVE to speak up. People aren't going to hold your hand and guide you through stuff. You have to know what you want. Everyone around is only there to help you. This frustrated me a lot at the beginning, but I suppose it's how life is.

 

And some teachers will be bad teachers. Some teachers you won't trust. It's like a lottery, almost. At my school, if you don't like your teacher, you can sometimes ask guidance to switch your classes for you. Obviously that might not be the case at your school but I highly recommend just reading about the school policies so you know what to do in case anything happens.

 

High school's a tough one. I was really stressed in my first semester, and that was without any friendship drama. I didn't know how to discipline myself or how to study or anything. I could give you strategies on how I managed to get through but this post is already long enough xD But the point is, you can't be terrified of high school. If you go to school every day, thinking negatively, no matter how truly bad it is, you are going to break. A 14/15-year old mind just can't handle that kind of stress.

 

As for making friends, I'd say the first day of high school, and basically the first week of it, you have to be on your best. If you're looking to get rid of your old friend group, the first week of school is the best time to get a new friend group because everyone is so new and open. As a hardcore introvert, this is hilarious coming from me, but I'd tell you to talk to anyone you can. Figure out who's interested in what you are, try to learn names and generally make a good first impression. I was lucky because most of my friends came to the same high school as I did and so I mostly just stuck with them.

 

The thing about high school is there's a lot more people, so chances are there will be more accepting people. I think I was able to get through because I had two friend groups, almost. If one group was unavailable, the other group was usually present. Again, I'd say you should talk to anyone, not only to figure out who's interested in what, but just to see who can be a "backup". If you find that your friend group for whatever reason is problematic, you can always have someone else to hang out with. And of course this doesn't mean simply using them as a Plan B.

 

The way I did it, I stayed with Group B before school, and I stayed with Group A during lunch. And Group B was almost always able to hang out before school, so I had no problems with that. And when Group A was unavailable at lunch, I stayed with Group B. Now that I think about it, I was pretty lucky, and this is also kind of off topic.

 

Another way to make friends with similar interests is to join clubs and stuff. To be fair, I didn't really get any actual friends at band that I hung out with outside of band, but it was fun, and I met a lot of different people, like seniors and juniors.

 

On that topic, I'd say it's pretty beneficial to befriend someone older than you. High school isn't really what the movies make it out to be. Every upperclassman was once a dumb freshman, and if you look hard enough, you'll find people who are willing to help you through high school. They can tell you stuff about high school like which teachers to avoid, how to succeed on exams, how to plan for post secondary stuff, all those good things, and it's just like having a cheat sheet. I know I would've liked someone who was not a teacher to help me through my freshman year.

 

Anyways, I think the main thing in high school is to communicate. Speak up to authority if there is a problem. Speak to new people, as hard as it might be. Speak to your teachers if you need help. Speak to upperclassmen for dank tips. Speak to your parents about proper punishments. All that stuff. High school's a lot of work, but it doesn't have to be super hard. Good luck, my doodette.

 

And if you need anything else you can just talk to me and I'll answer to the best of my ability :)

 

 

 

wow that was long O.o

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ChuCahill & MBer siπce '12

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tsunamininja5

Branch: Tomas

Thanks, Chu. :)

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- Lahash -

Also known as Samurai

Est. January 2014

 

Author of the Path of Legends series - coming 2020!

 

"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."