SKITTLES: *on top of the captain’s cabin* I CAN’T FIND THE SKITTLES!
ALEX: Oh, this is not good
ME: Anybody have a bag of skittles on them?
CHAI: *empties pockets* Um, I’ve got my phone with my encyclopedia and collection of ebooks- Hey!
ALEX: *throws phone into sea* DANGER, Chai, DANGER! DID NOBODY READ THE PAMPHLET?
CHAI: *holds up paper airplane* Not really
ALEX: *strangles the air*
ME: Focus, guys! What about the rest of you?
MARSHALL: *empties pockets* Nintendo DS, couple enderpearls, chocolate bar, butterfly knife, and keys
MATTMATT: *empties pockets*Hmm, I’ve got some M&Ms, a tablet, a first aid kit, and a teleporter
HUNTER: *empties pockets* A lighter and a miniature leaf blower
LYSS: *pulls out a fistful of knives* I also have Ricolas, a soccer ball, a pen and notebook, and of course my emergency curry powder
OZ: *holds up enormous ring of keys* All I’ve got is this and a sandwich
LYSS: *grabs the sandwich*
OZ: -_- Sure. You can have it. Wasn’t going to eat it anyway.
ME: What are you doing?
HUNTER: I’m summoning Kathy with my mind
ME: Yeah, like that’ll—
KATHY: I’m here!
ALEX: What do you have in your pockets?
KATHY: My ammo pockets or my weapons belt pockets or my regular pockets?
CHAI: Why did you feel the need to bring an entire arsenal?
KATHY: *shrugs* I was hoping you guys were about to be eaten by a sea monster
ME: Quick, Kathy, your pockets!
KATHY: *empties two packs of extra bullets, four pistols, and a grenade onto the boat*
ME: THE OTHER POCKETS!
KATHY: Oh! *digs into pocket* Umm, chocolate, a couple dollars, my Swiss Army Knife--
CHAI: Airports must love you
KATHY: Shut up. Wait, I have something! *pulls out a Pokeball*
ME: What’s in it?
KATHY: I don’t remember. *opens ball*
CHU: *falls out* IT’S ABOUT TIME!
ME: How did you fit in that tiny thing?
KATHY: She’s a pocket Chu
CHU: Next time you say, “Hey, Chu, crawl into this Pokeball for me,” I’m going to change my name and move to Kyrgyzstan!
KATHY: Someone’s feeling dramatic
MARSHALL: Here’s an idea. Let’s get Skittles down BEFORE SHE DIES
KATHY: Aha! *pulls out bag of Skittles*
SKITTLES: SKITTLES! *jumps off tower*
SKITTLES: *lands on trampoline* *bounces next to Kathy*
MATTMATT: Wow. That really came out of nowhere
KATHY: Ahh! SHE BIT ME! *shakes hand*
SKITTLES: SKITTLES 00
ALEX: Take the wrapper off fi—or you could just swallow it whole
MARSHALL: I’m thinking we should buy her a leash
ME: *pulls leash out of pockets* Here
HUNTER: How did you fit that in your pockets?
ME: It’s the MB. Nothing makes sense here. I also have the Ring of Power
MARSHALL: Lord of the Rings quotedown! MY PRECIOUSSS
ALEX: Not the time, Marshall
OZ: Uh, guys, is Freddy supposed to be leading the prisoners in a rebellion?
LYSS: Hmm, let me think. NO!
OZ: Then we might have a problem
FIVE MINUTES AGO
*brief description: an open space in the center, the walls lined with see-through cells that are all connected*
KATIE MICK: *surrounded by stacks of books* *sips from her tea* Lovely weather we’re having today
NATTIE RICHARDSON: *is passed out from fear of sea*
JAMES HALLIC: *pokes head in* Do you have any matches?
KATIE: *throws teacup at him* NO! Matches are NOT good for books!
BRIANNA GRACIE: *skips around cell singing* CupCAKES, canDY, cupCAKES, canDY, cupCAKES, canDY
ALIA FORDES: *bangs head against wall* *shouts* SOMEBODY MAKE HER STOP
HEATHER SPAR: *grumbles* Say it a little louder why don’t you
BRIANNA: CUPCAKESCANDYCUPCAKESCANDYCUPCAKESCANDY! *screams*
PRIYANKA BHAER: Megan, hand me the blowtorch!
MEGAN GOLDSTICK: *hands her padded stick*
PRIYANKA: *smacks herself in the head with it* OH MY GOSH I CAN SEE THE STAAAAAAAARS *falls backwards*
MEGAN: *smushes face against the wall* *sings Spongebob theme song*
KATIE: *screams* THERE’S SOMETHING IN MY TEA! IT’S MOVING!
HEATHER: *giggles* They’re Eskalian wart worms. They’ll make your tongue turn green
KATIE: *drops cup* *hops around cell smacking her tongue*
JAMIE KABRA: *doing a handstand* Nicely done, Spar
MALERIE: *in the cell with Brianna and Jamie* *throws glitter in the air* Sparkles! Sparkles sparkles sparkles!
JAMIE: *falls* GLITTER! CURSE YOU EMPTY-HEADED ONE, THIS NEVER GOES AWAY!
JAMES: *to Megan* Megan, do you have any matches?
MEGAN: *squeals* *jumps on him* *starts pulling his hair*
JAMES: AHH! CRAZY DEMON CHILD!! *staggers past Jamie with Megan on his head*
JAMIE: *holding Malerie by her feet* You guys are really in my personal space right now
MALERIE: *giggles* *licks glitter off her fingers*
JAMES: THERE IS A SIX YEAR OLD PULLING OUT MY HAIR!
MEGAN: *shoves a hand in his mouth* APPLES!
JAMES: *Ack gluh ugh*
FREDDY: Whoa, you guys are messed up
FREDDY: Yes, it is I, Emperor Freddy of Antarctica
BRIANNA: *raises hand* Um, aren’t you supposed to be in the Dangerous Criminals dungeon?
FREDDY: The Jabberwocky started eating people so I figured it was a good time to make my escape
KATIE: Would you like to join me for some tea, Emperor Freddy?
FREDDY: Tea is disgusting
KATIE: *throws herself at wall* *pounds her fists* LET ME AT HIM! LET ME AT HIM!
HEATHER: If you’re really an Emperor, how did they capture you?
FREDDY: They didn’t capture me. I’m here of my own free will
HEATHER: Then why were you in the dungeon?
FREDDY: *grits teeth* I was visiting my family
HEATHER: Then why did you have to escape?
FREDDY: STOP ASKING QUESTIONS!
HEATHER: *grins smugly*
PRIYANKA: *sits up* Freddy! Freddy, are we going to kill people?
FREDDY: Yes, dear. Lots and lots of people.
PRIYANKA: *gasps* Can we make them walk on beds of rusty nails? Can we throw them into a pit of scorpions?
FREDDY: Of course we can
JAMIE: *tying Malerie into a pretzel* I ate a scorpion once
FREDDY: I don’t doubt it
JAMES: *pulls Megan off his head* Lord Freddy, would you happen to have any matches?
FREDDY: *massages forehead* First of all, it is EMPEROR Freddy. Secondly, I am king of ANTARCTICA. WHY would I have any device responsible for making that despicable destructive anti-ice force?
HEATHER: Wow. Someone’s touchy
FREDDY: THAT’S IT! YOU’RE STAYING HERE!
HEATHER: I want to stay here
FREDDY: THEN YOU’RE COMING WITH!
HEATHER: MAKE ME! *holds up book* I’LL BRAIN YOU!
FREDDY: OK fine. You’re staying.
ALIA: *shouts* WHERE ARE WE GOING? WHY SHOULD WE GO WITH YOU? OH MY GOSH GUYS WHAT IF HE’S TRICKING US? NO WAIT HE’S EVIL OF COURSE HE’S TRICKING US BUT NOW THAT I’VE FIGURED OUT THAT YOU’RE TRICKING US I GUESS YOU’RE NOT TRICKING US ANYMORE SO WHERE ARE WE GOING?
FREDDY: *rubs his ears* We’re going to rebel, loud one
HEATHER: That’s not a place
FREDDY: I WILL FEED YOUR LIVER TO A KILLER WHALE SO HELP ME ODIN!
BRIANNA: Wait, why are we rebelling? I like it here
FREDDY: *stamps foot* You prisoners are insufferable!
JAMIE: I got this. GUYS THEY’RE HAVING A CAKE PARTY UPSTAIRS!
EVERYONE: *bellows* CAAAAAAAAAKE!
FREDDY: That’s better