Oh, my goodness. I feel like if we were all in a zombie apocalypse together we'd be too busy laughing to watch out for zombies. But in my head, this is how my dream plan goes.
"Here, in here!" I exclaim, running frantically to the empty, cobwebbed doorway of the abandoned warehouse. I get everyone inside while I keep an eye out for zombies. My contact lenses have miraculously lasted for weeks, so somehow my vision is still great.
"Why did you pull me out of my hole?" Bella asks, her hands and face streaked with dirt.
"Because you wouldn't have lasted two days," I reply, pushing a heavy beam in front of the door with my newly acquired muscles.
"No," Justin says as he approaches and looks seriously at Bella. "I would have rescued her."
Bella pulls out her chainsaw and begins chasing him around the warehouse, but I'm distracted by someone else.
"Ely," I say with a nod, knowing that even though I haven't showered in a month and my hair is a mess, I'm still super attractive to all guys, but especially this especially hot one.
"Hello, Anna," he says, and gestures at Bella and Justin. "Aren't they cute."
I nod and smile as she almost cuts off his head. "They are."
"So, what are you doing tomorrow night?" Ely asks.
"I had a zombie raid scheduled. Why?"
"I was wondering if you'd like to go find some edibles with me."
I smile up at him. "The zombie raid can wait. Dress code?"
"Dark clothes, face paint, biggest guns you have. Probably some bandages in your pocket." He takes my hand and smiles flirtaciously. "I'll bring some machetes," Ely whispers.
Three months later, the zombie resistance has prevailed, with me as its leader. I'm dating Ely and am in the process of gathering together all of the surviving humans to restart civilization. Also, all of the people I hate are gone.
Yay zombie apocalypse!
And there you have it!
Also, I recently taught my little brother to say bless you heart when he's mad at someone. I'm still not quite sure what I've done.